release, release, release...

today is a new day for me... i want to hate pom for not caring and not giving a damn about all the memories we've shared, i was hoping he atleast grieved for our broken relationship, but it seemed like he didn't... so what the hell for now i shall start hating him, i should know better by now, so i am hoping that in time i woulld be able to forget and forgive him... but not right now... it will take time... in my own time...

anyway i have been through a lot of stress lately and to all those who know my current problem thanking you for bearing with me, thank you for being my support group, you have been my sourece of stregnth... thank you antz for the wonderful trip to puerto galera, sleeping on the shore because the entire island was fully booked, thank you so much for making me happy, for letting me rest, you know i needed that, thank you so much.

to my amma and mommy, thank you so much for understanding my shortcomings, i know in some way or another i have disappointed you, and i am sorry, thank you for making me smile even if it was the hardest thing to do, thank you for the wonderful shell, now i have a mermaid sanctuary on the 5th floor.

oh before i forget... these are all random thoughts... unorganized but who cares these are all the memories i want to write down. when we were at puerto and antz was sleeping cause she felt dizy after drinking a bottle of beer i decided to lie down on the beach, feel the cool breeze of the night and the wonderful stars... oh that black velvet roof with diamond studs all over, what a wonderful sight, i felt happy and relaxed... and i saw 8 FALLING STARS! and i know i could not ask for more.

the divine mercy was what kept me sane and alive. thank you! i do trust in You.

i know i am not making sense anymore, but you know i really don't care anymore, and i still want to continue hating pom, i think somehow he desreves it... you know pom, i'll see you after 10-12 years, i hope by that time i'd be fully happy with myself, and i wont be to dependent on you as my source of happiness... finally over you... and HOME shall be mine and mine alone...

memories revisited
mirrored in my little teacup
i started to drink tea again, you know?
wishing to wash you away
to flash you
down the toilet bowl of my memory lane
together with all the unnecessary crap
i have kept as baggages

now i have to release
now i have to release
release
release
release

you will go down the smelly dark road
of longing and loneliness

feeling all fucked up
the way you felt when i asked you
if you still loved me

that same old feeling you felt
you big piece of crap!
its ok you big waste of time!
SHIT HAPPENS, remember!