i was supposed to go out with my law school girls at around 2pm yesterday, but just when i was about to get ready i just didn't feel like going out anymore, so i begged off.
it's because i'm really sick (cough and cold). but honsetly i don't i really want to talk to anybody right now. it's not that i don't want to see them i do! i do! i miss them alot! it's just that i don't want the "kamustahan" part. where you open the conversation with "kamusta ka na?", "ano naman bago sayo?", "ano na ginagawa mo sa buhay mo ngaun?" or "ano masaya ka ba?" cause honsetly i don't have the answers to those questions that's why i don't wanna see my friends and talk to them. maybe it's not just them i don't wanna see, maybe i don't wanna answer those questions cause that means i have to deal with my self, face my self. and i'm just not ready, or even, strong enough to do that now. it just sucks that i don't have plans, i'm not focused enough... i feel so empty right now(not in a dramatic way, but in the real sense of the word, i guess.) and now that i am writing about it, it reminds me of the pending i have to deal with, so i'm ending this blabbering right now.
(oh by the way (i know i said im going to stop talking but just hear this out) i didn't meet my lawschool girls, instead, they dropped by my place. and it was just so kind of them to not ask the unanswerable questions i was avoiding... (perhaps they know i don't wanna talk about it) thanks ice, abby and ren... it feels good to see them and feel their warmth... the comfort that friends give... but i just want to isolate myself right now... i'm sorry...)
it's because i'm really sick (cough and cold). but honsetly i don't i really want to talk to anybody right now. it's not that i don't want to see them i do! i do! i miss them alot! it's just that i don't want the "kamustahan" part. where you open the conversation with "kamusta ka na?", "ano naman bago sayo?", "ano na ginagawa mo sa buhay mo ngaun?" or "ano masaya ka ba?" cause honsetly i don't have the answers to those questions that's why i don't wanna see my friends and talk to them. maybe it's not just them i don't wanna see, maybe i don't wanna answer those questions cause that means i have to deal with my self, face my self. and i'm just not ready, or even, strong enough to do that now. it just sucks that i don't have plans, i'm not focused enough... i feel so empty right now(not in a dramatic way, but in the real sense of the word, i guess.) and now that i am writing about it, it reminds me of the pending i have to deal with, so i'm ending this blabbering right now.
(oh by the way (i know i said im going to stop talking but just hear this out) i didn't meet my lawschool girls, instead, they dropped by my place. and it was just so kind of them to not ask the unanswerable questions i was avoiding... (perhaps they know i don't wanna talk about it) thanks ice, abby and ren... it feels good to see them and feel their warmth... the comfort that friends give... but i just want to isolate myself right now... i'm sorry...)
1 comment:
hi tita.about this paragraph..use a lot of energy to pass it and face yourself and never turnback on your friendz coz i tried and it sucks....love you....ingat lagi...use a lot of passion..AJA>.haha
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